SOCIAL MARKET

by David Jay Bernstein © 2002

Kyle Jonas poked his head into Ms. Holiday's office. "Um...ma'am, may I talk to you?" he asked the middle-aged CEO of the World Economic Corporation for Health, Optimal Output and Social Efficiency. He was proud to work at WE CHOOSE -- not only was it the second largest corporation in the global marketing cartel, but it was also rated the best place to work by Money Magazine in their June 2032 issue.

"Yes, yes," said Ms. Holiday, motioning him to come in.

Kyle stepped into the office and waited patiently for her to finish her copy of the Wall Street Journal. She was one of the few people he knew that actually read the newsprint version of that paper -- a luxury of the wealthy. After a few minutes she looked up and said, "What do you want to discuss?"

"Sorry to disturb you, ma'am, but we just received a high priority e-mail from Bleeding Hearts (BH), our liberal subsidiary in Jerking Knee, Wyoming. They wanted to inform us of their plans for a social revolution next month. What do you think?"

Ms. Holiday shook her head and said evenly, "No, I'm afraid the timing is all wrong. We'd have to give the affiliates more notice." Then she sat back in her plush (real artificial) leather chair in thoughtful repose. "But," she considered, "it might make a good midsummer replacement for the anti-drug project. Ratings aren't as high as test groups predicted. Go tell them in marketing to work up the numbers for me."

"Very good, ma'am." Kyle started to leave.

"No, wait," she stopped him. "Scratch that. I forgot that the GAP just released their spring fashion line. It would take at least a year before they could design proper fashion for social upheaval. Besides, we wouldn't have time for any other product tie-ins -- McDonald's is committed to the Mars mission Happy Meals, and LEGO has the Ecumenical Humanism promotion."

Kyle shrugged. He knew that without anything to buy, who'd even notice a revolution?

"Reply back to that e-mail. Tell BH, we're sorry but there will be no revolution. The ratings would be too low at this time." Ms. Holiday paused for a moment and then smiled. "However, if they can find demonstrators willing to hold bottles of Coke, perhaps a small protest may be possible."

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